Dave Pundit's Predictions 22/08/09

Hi, I'm Dave Pundit. The new season is well under way and already questions are being asked as to which manager will be the first to get sacked. I remember when I first started at Tranmere my gaffer was under a lot of pressure because everyone thought he had screwed up in the transfer market over the summer. But he didn't quit, that just wasn't his style. He had a nervous breakdown and had to take medical retirement.

Arsenal v Portsmouth
A lot of people have condemned Portsmouth to relegation already but not Tony Adams, who as far as I'm aware was the last Englishman to play for Arsenal. I have to say I agree and I can see Pompey getting their campaign on track here. Let's face it they're not going to be intimidated by the Arsenal fans are they? It's so quiet at the Emirates you could hear a mouse trump.
Verdict 0-1

Birmingham v Stoke
I expect this to be a tough battle for both teams. It'll literally be a fire and brimstone affair. In fact I imagine there'll be more injuries than goals. All in all it has the makings of a true classic.
Verdict 0-0

Hull v Bolton
Birmingham v Stoke, Hull v Bolton could this be the best week of fixtures ever? The problem for Hull is defending and the problem for Bolton is that referees pick on Kevin Davies. But what do they expect he makes typical strikers tackles, clumsy and dangerous. He just needs to get rid of the clumsiness and then he'll be fine. But he's a forward who's willing to do his bit for the time and get stuck in. Let's face it that's far more important than these fancy dan foreign strikers with their 'goals' and 'assists'.
Verdict 0-1

Man City v Wolves
It would be easy to say that newly-promoted Wolves will go straight back down. So that's just what I'll do. Newly-promoted Wolves will go straight back down.
Verdict 2-0

Sunderland v Blackburn
Seriously, if I wasn't such a man I'd cry with delight at the fixture list. But I am a man, and so are most of the players in these two teams. I mean any team with Steve Bruce as a manager has to be manly. What's more manly than the name Bruce? And as for Big Sam what a manly nickname that is. I had a girlfriend nicknamed Big Brenda once, and she turned out to be a man.
Verdict 1-1

Wigan v Man Utd
Man Utd's loss against Burnley was a mere blip. Their spine is far to strong and English to be upset like that again. They just need to get rid of that Vidic chap and bring in a good English defender like Jonny Evans and they'll be sorted. Wigan haven't got a chance.
Verdict 0-3

West Ham v Tottenham
Harry Redknapp returns to his former club and I bet they wish they still had him in charge rather than some jumped up little Italian dwarf. Tottenham are sitting pretty at the top of the league and I can't see anyone displacing them. They are nailed on to clinch 4th spot in my book.
Verdict 0-2

Burnley v Everton
Everton were destroyed by Arsenal's quick passing game last week and I for one was disgusted. Why didn't David Moyes just resort to hacking Arsenal off the pitch? It's the English way. Let's not forget though that Everton finished 5th last year. I just don't think Burnley could ever hope to beat a team of that calibre.
Verdict 0-1

Fulham v Chelsea
Let's face it this isn't a proper local derby is it? Liverpool v Man Utd that's a proper local derby. This is just a couple of teams from an overpriced part of London poncing around. Well it would be if it wasn't for John Terry. He's like a local derby all on his own. In fact I'd go one step further I'd say John Terry is his very own civil war.
Verdict 0-3

Liverpool v Aston Villa
Both teams have had slow start to the season but Liverpool proved that they're still contenders with their 4-0 win in midweek. Villa on the other hand couldn't even beat Rapid Vienna. Quite frankly times are bad when you can't even beat a mid table German team.
Verdict 3-1